Thursday, August 17, 2006

Hakuna euthanasia

This type of shit just makes me furious. Punch a clown furious. Spit in a salad bar furious.

Allow me to quote the first two graphs from a week or so ago:

Five meerkats at the Minnesota Zoo were destroyed and tested for rabies Thursday after a girl was bitten when she reached her hand into the animals' exhibit.

The meerkats -- two mates and their three offspring born this spring -- had been vaccinated for rabies, but were ordered killed by the state Department of Health because the girl's parents didn't want her to have to undergo a series of rabies shots, said zoo collections manager Tony Fisher.

God forbid that Little Suzie Fuckwit gets a series of shots because she stuck her dumbfuck arm into an enclosure full of wild animals as her dumbfuck, mouth-breathing jackass parents stood idly by.

I'd like to hope they lost track of this kid because they were distracted as the DCFS agent was asking for ID as they prepped to release these kids into a pack of wild dogs where they'd have a fighting chance, but I suspect they were just watching their other little brats running free and tea-bagging the grizzlies or something.

I mean, Jesus...

It's good this little shit got a chunk taken out of her hand and all, but nothing says, "Stop being such a dumbshit" like a series of rabies shots to the gut.

Did we really need to kill five animals because Ma and Pa didn't want to have to take this brat to get her rabies boosters?

The funny thing is that I get a strange sense of calm when I look in my Bible under the book of Darwin, which says, in part: "Lo, the stupid and weakest members of a species tend to take care of themselves. That, or they are elected to public office."

(Image from moviecitygeek.com)

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Man - that's not funny! Have you ever been attacked by a Meerkat? They're like fucking Pitbulls! Thank God this sweet little girl wasn't fitting her head through the bars of the cage because those little fuckfaces go for the jugular if given the opportunity...
Oh yeah - can I get a chapter and verse on that scripture you quoted? I want to use that at Bible study this weekend.