I should be and think I'd make a damn fine representative of the NASCAR nation, but I just can't get over the red state stink that coats the whole thing.
Of course, I realized I should have live-blogged the whole Daytona 500 about 15 minutes too late on Sunday, but I offer you these pearls of wisdom days late and subject to the inaccuracies of my sick, sick mind.* In the pre-race discussions, one of the commentators was discussing the angles of the banks in the turns that help keep the cars on the track at 180 miles an hour.
Announcer: "Those are 30-degree angles on the banks there! That's a steeper angle than the roof on your house!"
My mind: "Well, no shit - most mobile homes just have a piece of corrugated metal welded straight to the the top, right?"
* I nearly went into patriotic shock while watching an American Idol alumnus, several huge American flags and a stars and stripes outline of the USA. It was a little over the top if you ask me.
Or anyone whose middle name isn't Lee, Ray, Jean, or Sue and is used as part of their full name in casual conversation.
Or who have received a gun rack as a gift at some point in their lives. I'll stop now.
* Everyone should add Idiocracy to their NetFlix queues right now. It's a cautionary tale, but just seeing a few crowd shots - in addition to Danny's photojournalism essay a few years back - made it all a little too real for me.
(Photo from: ThirdWayBlog.com)
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