It doesn't exist... unless you have some cash on you

West Virginia tourism, get ready for your closeup. Start building hotels, restaurants, gas stations and full plumbing systems. The John Kruk Museum is getting some company. OK, not really, but every little bit helps. Might want to look into that plumbing thing, though.

For nearly 50 years, beginning with the Eisenhower administration, a secret bunker has existed under a resort in West Virginia that was designed to house Congress after enraged citizens violently overthrew the government over the price of gasoline and an apparent conflict of interest between... no, wait... to house Congress in case of a nuclear attack by the Ruskies.

Cold War tensions meant having a 112,000 square foot bunker to house Congress just in case all hell broke loose. Not that the elimination of that threat made a damn bit of difference.

According to CNN.com, it took an article in The Washington Post to convince the government to pull the plug on the project. I have even money that says a new one was immediately under construction after the cover was blown. I also have two to one that George W. tried to repurpose this bitch to play spy games with the other kids in the neighborhood once he found out it existed.

In addition to the usual thick walls and bunk beds, there was also a television studio with spring and fall backdrops (because everyone knows the Russians would never bomb in the summer or winter, right?). Also according to CNN - For 30 years, though, staff working undercover as television repairmen kept the bunker constantly ready to support 1,100 people, with everything from food to books, magazines and board games.

Dude, that is some shitty, shitty cable service... What else would you expect from trying to run a signal underground?

(Image from: ctgilles.net)